If there is only one piece of advice I can give ANYONE (not just those in the midst of a divorce) it is this - SAVE THE RECEIPTS AND BANK STATEMENTS!! I was one of those people that glanced over my credit card statement then shredded it. I kept my paper bank statements for a couple of years then tossed them into the burn pit. Receipts? Puh-leaze those were trashed before I even left the store.
Little did I know just how precious those little pieces of paper would be. When trying to prove how much money I had spent remodeling and redecorating TheColdOne's house for divorce settlement purposes, his attorney wanted itemized statements showing how much money I spent and on what - going back for 10 years! My attorney advised me that it would be a "he said-she said" situation that would probably not go in my favor without documentation.
Luckily there were a few things I had saved. I was able to find the account numbers of some old credit cards that were closed long ago and contacted the customer service center. When I asked for copies of the itemized receipts, most of them just sighed and went into the spiel about how much it would cost me. I will admit that some of them were very kind when I explained what I needed them for and waived the fee. Of course I could only get back as far as 6 years but that was better than nothing. Don't let anyone say it can't be done because I was able to do it. AND don't let YOUR ColdOne claim they can't get the information for YOUR attorney - that's what mine claimed and I can prove him wrong with just one flick of a file folder.
Check with your bank about getting copies of the old statements. I was able to go online and order copies of my checking account statements from as far back as 2000. The great thing was I used my debit card instead of checks so the details were printed out on the statement.
I did have a good deal on information on Quicken - but the attorney said having the actual statements would be best. I was able to input the old information from the statements into Quicken and pull up reports breaking down expenses. THAT was very helpful in compiling a list of what I spent and where I spent it.
Can't find the account numbers? Having trouble figuring out what that large check was written for? (it costs a pretty penny to get copies of old cancelled checks). Pull out your income tax files. I was lucky that I had used Quicken for years so despite my computer crashing about 6 years ago, I still had the reports printed from Quicken with expenses broken down. I was able to correlate those to some of the bank statements to figure out whether or not the check I wrote at Kroger was for groceries or medication.
Yes it was a lot of work. Yes it took a lot of time. But hopefully it was worth it - we'll see when we finally get to mediation. Another great thing about going through the receipts and statements - it made me realize just how much money I simply blew away on junk. It was a great motivator to help me get my personal finances back on track now that I'm the only income.
In the meantime, start saving the receipts and statements. Make notes on them for what exactly the item was used for. Keep them in a safe place. You never know if you'll need them until you get slapped upside the head like I was.
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